Friday, May 15, 2015

To My Boy On His 6th Birthday

I listen to you in the other room. You are watching one of your shows. One you've seen a thousand times. You are having a full-on conversation with what you are watching and as I listen, I strain to understand just what you are saying. Happy sounds. Vowels and consonants. Music to my ears, but foreign none the less. Oh how I love your voice. Especially when you get sleepy, so many sounds come out. It's my most favorite time. When your body relaxes and you are able to release all those thoughts. You speak as if we can understand you. And we can, because we know you are happy.

When you were dedicated at church, one of the pastors, before praying over you, said you would be a mystery to us. That there would be times when we would scratch our head and wonder about you. When he said it, I didn't give it much thought. At that time you were just turning one. But as I look upon you now, as a six year old, he was so right on the money.

You are a mystery. We wonder about the future. Oh the questions we have. But we cherish each day. As we watch you grow and come into your own personality, we notice you are silly, quirky, loving, happy, and energetic. You fiercely love your routine. We don't know the why or the how most of the time, but we do know that you are loving life. It's all we could have hoped for.

I notice each new freckle on your beautiful face. I notice the way you walk and how you adapt to each growth spurt. You are tall and lean like daddy, but have the wide and big hands of your Grandpa Cheeks. I see that you are about to lose your first tooth. How can this be? My sweet baby Jack is growing and time does not stop.

You live with gusto. At the Governor's signing of the ABLE Act, daddy was holding you and you noticed that the person he was chatting with was drinking a coffee from Starbucks. You dove in for a drink like there was no tomorrow. The look on this person's face was priceless. You just went for it. No fear.

Kinda like how you line-lead at school. I have been just tickled by how serious you are about being the line-leader. Like it's your job. Proud mama, here.

Tickles are still your favorite. I think you would choose to be tickled all day, every day, if you could. And I am happy to oblige, because you have the best giggle around. I love each moment I have with you. Our walks. Our playtime. Our cuddles and nose kisses. When you snuggle in to fall asleep. I love the thousand ways you communicate, but especially when you come find me, grab my hand, and take me to play with you. I know these moments are fleeting. As you grow I am so aware of that.

The greatest lessons of my own life have come from you. The perspective you have brought to my life, I could write about forever. The razor sharp vision you've given - it is a gift. In the disability community, I know it's not the politically correct thing to say these days, but you inspire me. You really do. I don't glorify our experience or make you out to be some angelic being. You struggle just like every other human, but that doesn't mean you can't inspire me. I've seen where you've come from and just how far you've gone. I want to be like you.

No one I know goes through each day with as many physical and mental roadblocks as you do, and still, you have a giant smile on your face. The joy you put out to this world is contagious. From the moment I knew I was having you, it has been my absolute privilege to be your mom.

Yes, I will read the bath time book to you as many times as you want. I will blow those bubbles. I will take you on another walk. I will play peekaboo and jump on the bed with you. I will take you up and down the stairs and outside. I will sit in the sunshine with you anytime, sweetie. I will always be your biggest cheerleader.

Happy 6th Birthday, my boy. I can't wait to see what you do.

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2 comments:

Beverly said...

Your writing touches my heart but never as much as Jack's smile! Happy Birthday, Jack!

Julie said...

Beautiful! Tears in my eyes, even as I laughed out loud about the Starbucks...I've seen that dive in action! Happy birthday Jack! So honored to be one of your people,