|I couldn't love this picture more.|
I am sitting here in my apartment. Christmas music playing. Holiday candle burning (think cinnamon spice). Drinking a piping hot chai. Dreaming of the holidays. I am not usually one to start celebrating so early, but I figure if I want to finish strong through these next 6 weeks, I just have to go for it and remind myself what is at the end of the tunnel.
Today besides my school work, I plan to head to a store specifically to purchase construction paper to make one of those nifty countdown chains. Seriously, I am going to get all crafty today.
Honestly friends, it got super rough here last week. I was desperately missing my boys. I was lonely for my family and friends. I was feeling discouraged about school. There is a lot of pressure in my program and I was feeling it. On top of that, the worst - Jack was so ill. He got a migraine after his Botox treatment (any stressful event can trigger a migraine) and he was so, so sick. For five days he didn't eat. He was lethargic and in so much pain. We always wonder about a shunt malfunction. I was down here at school, totally unable to help. I debated jumping on the plane no less than a hundred times.
When I finally arrived home late Thursday evening, I basically collapsed into the goodness of being HOME. Jack was so, so skinny, but he was feeling better. His appetite was back. I took a deep breath.
This whole arrangement is no joke. It is hard. In fact, I often have to remind myself "you can do hard things, Jessi." I sometimes repeat that to myself a dozen times a day. When I feel like picking up and bolting this whole thing, I have to remind myself that quitting is not an option and I am in this for the long haul. The dream of going back to school is happening right now. My tendency to be a "grass is always greener" person often clouds my vision and I have to remind myself how amazing this opportunity is.
It seems that a weekend at home and a few pep talks is all that was needed. And crafting. Today I will craft my countdown chain. I will spend the next 6 weeks finishing up my writing and projects, looking forward to a wonderful winter break.